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An email from a site visitor asks about the possible use of hypnosis tapes to deal with "trust issues." The email describes childhood neglect and abuse experiences, and other violations of caretaker responsibilities. ["I expect these behaviors in all people...." "I don't have any true trust for anyone. You can imagine what this does to relationships." "...I would love to know if one or more of your tapes could help."]
Having experienced violations of trust as a child -- or violations of trust as an adult -- it's normal to experience difficulties trusting others. It's normal to experience difficulties trusting one's self. It's even normal to feel an underlying sense of shame and not want to speak about these experiences to anyone. It's normal to assume that if you go through bad things, you must somehow have deserved them and it's normal to think you're stupid if you don't see what you did to deserve what you got. This is true no matter what age one is, but it is especially true for children. It's very common for a child to assume crappy experiences are brought onto one's self by being deserving of them and by being too stupid to avoid them or understand them. This is because children need to feel they are being taken care of and that the people taking care of them know what they're doing. If, as a child, you believe your loved ones are actually messing with your mind because they're goofed up, you enter into a terrible anxious depression that likely will kill you. So it's normal to develop a pretty firm attitude that you should not trust your own thinking because you think that you are inadequate and flawed (which, ironically does make you flawed and less adequate to many tasks than you would have been without these thoughts). Even after you can look at this with an adult mind, it's hard to shake the old thinking.
It is pretty much essential to start off dealing with trust issues by acknowledging that they come from hurts and traumas, and that its normal to have them under those circumstances. And it's important to talk about them with others because in the privacy of your own mind, you might have some twisted perspectives that you might not notice but that someone else might. One of the most emotionally counter-productive strategies in dealing with the left-over feelings from childhood or adult traumas and hurts is to assume that it's important to hide victimization from all others because it's unusual and that being victimized by such experiences means they must have been deserved. It is very important to talk to someone about what goes on in one's head. We are a species that needs the clarification that talking about things brings. It is one of the dumbest things in the world to assume that childhood neglect or abuse was deserved (yes, its normal, but its still dumb). One of the most emotionally counter-productive strategies in dealing with the left-over feelings from childhood or adult traumas and hurts is to haphazardly disclose to just anyone that you feel pain about being victimized. It's very important to talk to someone about what goes on in one's head, but it's very silly to tell just anyone where and what exactly your most painful feelings are. We are a species that treats vulnerability very badly as a rule. It is one of the dumbest things in the world to assume that you can show your pain to others without thought to how mean they may be with that information. That doesn't mean you should necessarily hide that you have survived hurt -- just that you shouldn't show that it still hurts. (For that matter, sometimes being disclosive suggests to others that you don't hurt there.) There are several kinds of trust issues that can arise from past hurts. Below is the beginning of a list. It's not all-inclusive and it may be added to or revised at random times. I-expect-things-to-go-bad-&-I-seem-to-make-them-go-bad trust issues People come to me complaining of trust issues sometimes saying they are so anxious in relationships that they get overly controlling, overly paranoid and accusatory, and generally emotionally abusive. They say they find themselves watching themselves do this, unable to exert any control over their own behavior. They ultimately cause the demise of valued relationships while panicking about the loss while they do it. This is a trust issue. However, it's usually more an issue of not trusting one's self. For the individual who does this to him- or herself without good cause, there's usually an underlying assumption of unworthiness of a good relationship. There's a belief that the relationship is an accident. There's a pervasive sense of being extremely let-go-able that seems to increase over time. ("S/He can't possibly really be in love with me," .... "S/He will be cheating on me, if it's not already happening -- I just know it." .... "It's only a matter of time until I'm abandoned again." .... "I can't stand not knowing!" .... "I'm going to confront her/him as soon as I get home!" .... "I'm NOT going to stand for this!") This is often also an anxiety problem about "knowing." Some people -- especially survivors of violations of trust -- spend all sorts of time telling themselves they need to KNOW what's going to happen in their relationship -- is it going to last or be trashed. This is in spite of the fact that they really don't and can't "Know" anything much for sure about anything ("Have you ever had a dream, Neo, that you were so sure was real...? What if you were unable to awaken from that dream? How would you know the difference between the dream world and the real world?" -- Morpheus, in The Matrix). Unfortunately, the only way to KNOW what is going to happen with something in this world is to trash it. If you want to know if your car will last through the year, the only way to KNOW is to drive it into a lake. If you want to KNOW if your child will ever be successful, the only way to KNOW is to kill him. If you want to KNOW if you will keep your job, quit. If you want to KNOW if your relationship will last, trash it, end it, and you'll know. Help! If the problem is that you have too little trust in yourself and you trash things rather than giving them a chance to happen, there are several things to do to self-help. First of all, it's a good idea to accept the adventure of not knowing what's going to happen in life. It helps to remind yourself that you do this in many areas of your life already. Second, its a good idea to work on trusting yourself to survive a break-up. If you decide how you will survive the worst that might happen, you won't have so much underlying anxiety -- as compared to saying over and over to yourself that you won't be able to handle it if there is a breakup. If you remind yourself that you've survived all of life's crappier moments so far, you won't feel so panicked about the idea of a breakup. Third, trust that there is a Plan that a Higher Power has going and you're part of it whether you know it or not, or trust that there's no plan, no higher power, and in a hundred years whatever pain you get into will be over and out of mind. Hypnosis (or Reiki, NLP, relaxation, guided imagery, meditation, spiritual, etc.) might assist if you pretty much buy the idea that you need to trust yourself more and that life isn't just a job, its an adventure. Hypnosis -- or whatever -- can help if it's focused on fostering self-esteem, on awareness of your ability to survive and your track record in doing so, and on understanding that you can stay on your toes, enjoy life and still be content and relaxed. Of the head-cleaners recordings, several might be helpful -- check out the trust issues page. Other tapes and CDs by other makers of such self-help stuff may help, too. Psychotherapy is the best direction to go if this is more of a difficulty than a little understanding and maybe a hypnosis tape or CD can handle. Check out Finding a Psychotherapist, Counselor, Shrink for a few ideas about finding a good therapist. "I've-been-around-too-much"-but-I-want-to-ignore-what-I-know trust issues People come to me complaining of this kind of trust issue a lot. Most are women, but some are men. Most tell me that they've been in abusive, caustic relationships in the past that were painful to the extreme -- and this, they think, is why they have trust issues. Asked for an explanation and some examples, they tell me they're in a relationship with someone who does things, says things and/or seems to act in ways that call up memories of the past relationship(s) that were abusive. This someone has informed him or her that he or she has "trust issues." He or she comes to me and asks for treatment for these "trust issues." This is a trust issue. It's another issue of not trusting one's self. In this case the issue is not trusting one's mind to pick up on subtle pieces of information and match certain factors that are similar between situations. Alarms are going off and the individual doesn't trust his or her own alarm system. This would be a simple anxiety reaction if, say, the new girlfriend has a shirt the same color that some past crappy significant other used to wear. (You get run over by a bus wearing a certain outfit and see if it doesn't make you anxious to put the outfit on again years later, or even see it on someone else.) If it's a shirt similarity or a word use similarity or some problem of this calibre, it isn't usually a big problem to ask the friend to refrain from wearing it around you or stop doing or saying whatever is bothering. But you probably wouldn't even think of that as a trust issue. On the other hand, if the girlfriend conveys the information that as far as she is concerned, it's your tough luck that the shirt or her words bother you (and she's not about to give a crap about some problem you have because of some past relationship, and, by damn, she's not going to pay for some other gal's behavior) -- THAT might be a good reason for your brain to put you on alert (because that may be a clear indication that she has those wonderfully self-centered qualities that make abusiveness so easy to hand out)!
I've literally had dozens of people tell me they had trust issues and that they knew this because of increasing anxiousness about their new significant other who had been doing and saying exactly the same things that their abusive past love had said and done. Their new significant other had told them that this was their own problem and that the significant other expected them to get it fixed so s/he (the signif. other) didn't have to pay for the mistakes of others. What's wrong with that picture? Our minds like to help us by remembering the elements of past disasters, so we can be more mindful when those elements come up again -- and maybe we can alert ourselves before we get in too deep next time. When such information has been so painfully paid for we might want to tweek it or fine tune it, but why on earth would anyone want to discard it? So how can you tell the difference between this problem and the one above? Get someone else involved -- a counselor-type that isn't part of your world. Several times a couple has come to me for help along these lines. The one has anxiousness problems because of some things that were said or done that recalled past traumas and other "lovers." The other wants to know what he or she can do or avoid doing to help his/her loved one learn to "trust" and be comfortable with their relationship and their love. Now there's a picture that there's something right with.
Help! If the problem is that you have too little trust in yourself, there are several things to do to self-help -- much like the issue above. One thing to do is people watch -- not to see how many people seem to be doing better, but to see how they seem to be doing better. Pay attention to people and movies and books about people. Embark on a life-long pursuit of gathering more and more information about how people make life work, why and when, and how they screw up. Second (and by "second" I don't mean after number one -- these aren't in any particular order), check out how you keep track of how many blunders you make versus how many successes. You need to be as accurate as possible in figuring out how often you make good decisions in the various areas of your life. If you feel pretty successful, you won't feel so anxious. If you know you have blind spots in some areas, you can get others' input before making decisions in those areas. Many people goof themselves up by counting blunders of any size and only fabulous, amazing successes in their data keeping. They do the math and decide they mostly make bad decisions. Of the tens of thousands of decisions they make daily, they don't count any except those that go badly. (For example, in driving from home to work, several hundreds, if not several thousands, of decisions are made. All those decisions that don't result in a blunder go unnoticed. If one is made badly, however, and a fender-bender occurs, that one gets counted. With that kind of data collection, several hundred good ignored decisions plus one bad counted one adds up to 100% bad decisions.) It helps a lot in developing a sense of trust in one's self if one has an accurate understanding of how often one's judgements are right. Basically, if you're a teenager or older and still breathing, the vast majority of your decisions in the past must have gone well -- you are mostly successful and you can pretty much trust yourself to make decisions. Third, it helps to consciously think to yourself -- say to yourself -- that you are going to make a comittment to self-care. Mostly this means that you'll make a comittment to yourself that you'll treat yourself and talk to yourself as you would treat or talk to a really close friend. (Talking to yourself and/or with yourself is okay. Just don't do it out loud when in public.) Fourth, make yourself a small list of people you can speak to about trust issues -- to sort of review or go over your thinking -- and then utilize those folks to check out your thinking about trust. We're social creatures. We function best if we check out our thinking with others that we "trust" to give us some helpful, insightful, intelligent feedback. Fifth, decide you're going to a) trust yourself to decide whether to take anxious responses to others seriously (maybe with some input from others first if you decide you want it), b) trust yourself to survive any mistakes you may make (you've survived everything so far, right?), and c) trust that there is either a Plan that a Higher Power has going and you're part of it whether you know it or not, or decide that there's no plan and no higher power and that in a hundred years whatever pain you get into will be over and out of mind. Hypnosis might assist. Hypnosis focused on fostering self-esteem, awareness and understanding while soothing anxiousness can help. Of the head-cleaners recordings, "letting love go to dizzying heights" is the most "on target" choice for fostering a sense of resiliency and faith in one's ability to survive the risks that love involves. It helps by fostering the listener's ability to just risk trusting and forget fears while feeling more connected to his or her partner. Other tapes and CDs can also help. "Self to self partnering," "now to how to soothe out angst," "performance 2," "healing tree 2" and "relax...relax..." contain elements that are meant to address these kinds of issues. Other tapes and CDs will be added to the site that will be more directly addressing this problem -- check out the trust issues page. Other tapes and CDs by other makers of such self-help stuff may help, too -- hypnosis, Reiki, NLP, relaxation, guided imagery, meditation, spiritual, etc. Psychotherapy is the best direction to go if this is more of a difficulty than a little understanding and maybe a hypnosis tape/CDs can handle. I-get-close-and-then-closer-but-then-I-push-him/her-away trust issues You can call this a trust issue but it's better defined as an anxiousness issue. It's pretty much like the first issue only with less intensity and without the certainty that you are going to be dumped. You just get anxious about closeness. When life has taught a person that many other individuals are dangerous -- even the ones that are supposed to love you and care for you -- it is pretty much "normal" to be anxious about letting your guard down around anyone, ever. Alarms go off when the brain perceives that there is a closeness that has in the past been associated with a lot of pain. You can try to consciously stop the reaction, but basic, inner, "unconscious" mechanisms are ringing the panic alarm. "Unconscious processes begin organizing perceptions and behaviors that will sabotage the relationship and get things back into the safety zone. Help! First of all, recognize and assure yourself that this is your brain reminding you to be watchful because you're on ground that in the past was dangerous. Though your first impulse might be to run away, the anxiousness is only your brain's way of making you more vigilant and careful. This is an area where hypnosis can often help. Hypnosis focused on soothing and calming down those alarms can help immensely IF the situation is ONLY related to coincidences and not related to real cause for alarm. It is quite stupid and probably almost impossible to calm one's alarms if there is good reason for the alarms. If there is no good reason for the alarms, though, "letting love go to dizzying heights" is the most "on target" choice for fostering a sense of resiliency and faith in one's ability to survive the risks that love involves. It helps by fostering the listener's ability to just risk trusting and forget fears while feeling more connected to his or her partner. Of the other head-cleaners selections, "performance 2," "healing tree 2," "relax...relax..." and "two voices to imagine" all contain elements that are meant to calm impractical, counterproductive anxiousness. These tapes and CDs and others, along with some further discussion of the "trust thing" are collected on the trust issues page. Again, other tapes/CDs by other makers of such self-help stuff may help, too -- hypnosis, Reiki, NLP, relaxation, guided imagery, meditation, spiritual, etc. As with the above, psychotherapy is the best direction to go if this is more of a difficulty than a little understanding and maybe a hypnosis tape/CD can handle. I-try-to-control-the-wrong-things (I get into bad relationships) trust issues Some people unconsciously control their trust issues by avoiding anyone trustworthy or by trying to establish some major hold over the people they want to get close to. (If you are in an affair with a married person, you have a great deal of control over them. If you provide a lot of financial support, you have a great deal of control.) If you sit down and really think about things and the problem is that you get into relationships with really wrong people -- married, likely to hurt you, etc. -- or you trash relationships by making them dependent in some way -- then you need to work on this problem like an impulse control problem -- like someone who gambles, drinks too much, eats too much or spends too much. Help! You would probably want to get in control of dumb tendencies. Like a person who needs to stay away from donut shops, you need to identify and avoid places where you might meet such people, get in the habit of questioning certain kinds of decisions and self-statements, accept that you have a blind spot here and talk your thinking over very early in the relationship with some friends. If you find yourself getting into something you shouldn't, get out as soon as possible. If you find yourself trying to make someone dependent, tell them and ask them to help you knock it off. This process usually involves lots of trials -- relapses -- where you learn a little more about your own blind spots each time. This is also an area that hypnosis might help with if it is focused on fostering self-awareness and self-control. Of the head-cleaners recordings, "performance 2," "healing tree 2" and "two voices to imagine" contain elements that are meant to address self-control issues. (Again, see the trust issues page.) And, again, other tapes and CDs by other makers of such self-help stuff may help, too -- hypnosis, Reiki, NLP, relaxation, guided imagery, meditation, spiritual, etc. As with the above, psychotherapy is the best direction to go if this is more of a difficulty than a little understanding and maybe a hypnosis tape/CD can handle. I-get-panicked-and-thrash-out-when-the-person-I-"trust"-makes-a-blunder trust issues This usually happens when a person who has survived hurtful experiences with others is in a good and lengthy relationship with someone who is basically good and supportive and an asset to have around -- and then that other person makes a blunder that really messes up things. This would be normal for anyone profoundly hurt in their past by a "trusted" loved one. This would send off all sorts of alarms and the normal reaction would be to think about never trusting that person again, exiting the relationship or terminating one's self. Help! When this happens, it's best to really assess if the relationship is worth it AFTER waiting at least a week. During the week, try to put things in perspective by assessing whether the risks in "trusting" the other really outweigh the benefits or whether it's the other way around -- both by yourself and with one to three other people that are intelligent and not closely connected to the situation. In assessing this it's advisable to keep in mind that you've survived everything (EVERYTHING) so far in life -- even the blunder (maybe not as smoothly as you would have liked, but you survived or you wouldn't have any of this on your mind). A hypnosis (or other self help) tape/CD might assist in the growth process -- in the aftermath of deciding maybe it is okay to stay in the relationship -- after deciding that maybe you can "trust" your friend or lover to be perfect 85% or so of the time and trust yourself to be able to cover the other 15% well enough. Of the head-cleaners recordings, "healing tree 2" or "now to how to soothe out angst" would help soothe the nerves and help you let go of the anxiousness and hurt. (Again, see the trust issues page.) I-get-suspicious-of-co-workers,-bosses-and-underlings trust issues The question here is, does one need to trust people to work with them? It depends on how you define "trust." It's probably wise to expect humans to generally be like most humans are. Many are generous and giving and loving and nice. Many are petty and viscious and angry and ready to take out their hurts on as many others as possible. Many are somewhere near one or in between the two. It might be a bit silly to "trust" people in general to care about anything but their own interests, pleasures, anxieties and pains. Help! Accept it. Mostly life is a swamp with all sorts of beautiful things but with all sorts of out-in-the-open dangers and all sorts of hidden dangers. Mostly it is good to be cautious of others. Lots of people tell lots of other people that people should be trusting -- but they're mostly either simplistic-minded, simple-minded, con-artists, salesmen or "mental." It makes sense to let your anxiousness about trusting remind you that you should take heed. It makes sense to think carefully about the risks you may be taking in trusting others. Hypnosis would possibly help if it focused on accepting that it's okay to have a balanced outlook on life -- to be a little bit cautious of others but also to trust yourself to survive if you get blind-sided. "Healing tree 2" focuses on accepting change and might help IF you already decided to change ideas in this area. "Relax...relax..." is to aid in being able to relax while remaining alert. And, again, psychotherapy is a good idea if these ideas are not enough to deal with your issues. (See the trust issues page.) I-get-suspicious-of-pretty-much-everybody trust issues Does one actually need to "trust" people to live comfortably on the planet with them? Well, if you "trust" them to be normal people (and thus likely to be a potential danger or at least a hassle to you), then, yes, "trust" everyone. Again, though many people are generous and giving and loving and nice, many others are petty and viscious and angry and ready to take out their hurts on others. Many are somewhere near one or in between the two. Some people feel that only they have problems with trusting others. They get the impression that others seem to go through life without care about trust issues or anxiousness. Actually, being a little skeptical and distrustful is both practical and natural. The reason behind the impression that everyone else is dealing with life more easily is often the comparrison between one's inside feelings and others' outside appearances. If you look at people's outsides, you see them all seeming to be calm and trusting -- more or less -- but when you get to brass tacks with many people, they will tell you that inside they are anxious about many things in life, and that they try not to outwardly reveal it. They know better than to "trust" others with outward information about their inner anxieties. Help! Accept that a bit of anxiousness about others is practical. Accept that life is pretty much a sometimes very pretty swamp with all sorts of dangers. It's worth saying again: mostly it is good to be cautious of others until you know them well enough to predict their behavior. Lots of people tell lots of other people that people should be trusting -- but they're mostly either simplistic-minded, simple-minded, con-artists, salesmen or "mental." If you find you have trouble leaving the house or functioning at work or school because of your sense of distrust -- or if you find yourself depressed because of these feelings -- THEN you probably have too much anxiety about all this. It makes sense to let your anxiousness about trusting remind you that you need to take heed and think carefully about potential risks in trusting others. It doesn't make sense to let your anxiousness overwhelm your life. If you're having troubles in this area, hypnosis could possibly help if it focused on accepting that reality that it is simply important to be a little paranoid most of the time. "Healing tree 2" focuses on accepting change and might help IF you already decided to change ideas in this area. "Relax...relax..." is for relaxing while remaining alert. But, again, psychotherapy is the best idea (maybe with some hypnosis and even some medication tossed in) if anxieties about others -- and anxieties about your abilities to survive dealing with others -- are in the way of functioning at work, play, school or home. (See the trust issues page.) I-close-my-eyes-and-leap-into-any-relationship-I-can-get (as-fast-as-I-get-a-chance-to) trust issues This, of course, is the no-trust-in-self issue to the max. One assumes one's self to be unloveable and/or worthless and jumps at any chance at any relationship with anyone even remotely, vaguely, possibly, maybe a likely candidate for a relationship. No trust in one's own ability to wait for better prospects, no trust in one's own judgement so why bother even engaging the brain. And then when things go to trash, one wonders why he or she could not trust better. (Duh.) Help! Pretty much all of the above help suggestions apply. It's really important to figure out how much one discounts one's own mind and learning experiences. It's sometimes very helpful to go over any and all negative attitudes about one's self and ask one's self if these attitudes would be appropriate if it were anyone else that was being thought about -- a neighbor, a friend, etc. (That is, you ask yourself if so-and-so went through a similar life of experiences would you believe the same negative things about him or her or would your conclusions be different?) I-get-VERY-suspicious-of-the-opposite-sex trust issues This is an area of age-old difficulties. Men and women are different -- they see things differently, they speak of things differently, they deal with things differently and they're pushed into powerful feelings of neediness, attachment and threat because of a genetically programmed, species-perpetuating, mindless biological chemical attractions and compulsions. Men don't understand women. Women are better at understanding men but they screw up, too, with enough frequency that communication and partnering between the two sexes is enormously complicated and causal of all sorts of misunderstandings, mistakes, hurts, angers and upsets. Partnering and loving seem so important that when people are anxious about the possibility of hurts, they often cause themselves their own worst nightmares through a variety of self-fulling-prophesy-starting behaviors. Help! The best help is probably "a hair of the dog that bit you" -- either an understanding lover or a good therapist of the opposite sex -- or both. The more you understand the opposite sex, the better. The "Men are from Mars, Women from Venus" books are very helpful. Self-help hypnosis and other stuff like it may help if you find something that directly speaks to the issue of letting yourself approach male-female relationships with patience and as little of the alarms from childhood as possible. There aren't any head-cleaners tapes or CDs along these lines. A curitive relationship with an understanding, patient lover and/or a therapist of the opposite sex will probably do the most for you in this area. Generally speaking, it's best to see yourself as trustingly challenged rather than trustingly damaged. It's better to see yourself as a survivor rather than a victim. It will be harder to find the right partner of the opposite sex because childhood issues make your life more complicated. You will need to "test drive" more potential partners (date more) than if you had had a different childhood. Life's a bitch. Just like in school, some kids have to study harder than others for the same grade. It's just the way it is. Maybe there's a Purpose and a Plan. The cards you get dealt are the cards you have to play -- it's a very helpful move to accept that you are stuck with the cards but that you can scheme and strategize and be clever about how you play them. It's very un-helpful to waste a lot of time telling yourself you're hopeless and helpless and can't stand it. Generally speaking, the bigger your trust issues are, the more you should expect periods of panic about the alarms you are fine tuning and over-riding. Everyone who has been driving for more than a year or two has had the experience of almost falling asleep at the wheel and suddenly jerking awake with a panic about what almost happened. This is what happens as you get used to trusting in a practical, intelligent manner -- for the first year or two things go along fine but every once in awhile you suddenly get a little panic feeling. This is the result of your brain suddenly noticing that you are trusting! Generally speaking, if you try to use hypnosis, anti-anxiety medication, alcohol or any other form intervention to target just the anxiety of trust issues without dealing directly with the attitudes and strategies that underlie them, you are likely to simply cause yourself more trauma and harm. (That would be like having a broken leg and taking pain meds to not feel the pain so you can walk or run or work or play without casting or splinting the leg.) If you think you may need to see a psychotherapist or other type of doctor, don't try to use hypnosis tapes/CDs instead -- if you think you may need a doctor, see one. If you do want to try using hypnosis tapes or CDs, use recordings that focus on underlying causes -- like (coincidentally) head-cleaners hypnosis tapes & CDs. For example, hypnosis that focuses on targetting symptoms only might focus on reducing thinking, reduce anxiousness feelings, increase physical relaxation, while hypnosis focused on addressing underlying causes might focus on reducing dread related to feeling that you cannot survive another emotional hurt (which is likely very untrue), increasing your sense of resiliency and ability to take risks when they seem reasonable and increasing your resolve that you will terminate a relationship that rationally, logically seems a certain dead end. "Letting love go to dizzying heights" is the most "on target" choice for fostering trust and connectedness with one's partner. It focuses on fostering a sense of resiliency and faith in one's ability to survive the risks that love involves. It helps by fostering the listener's ability to just risk trusting and forget fears while feeling more connected to his or her partner. |
For other articles stimulated by questions about dealing with things and whether hypnosis tapes and CDs might or might not help, check the list of short and some lengthy articles. 
Also, if you decide to try a head-cleaners tape or CD, check the sample page to get an idea of what to expect and "successfully using head-cleaners tapes/CDs" for some suggestions on optimizing the use of hypnosis tapes and CDs. If you are considering consulting a psychotherapist or counselor, see the brief comments on finding a therapist. A final word to the wise: don't forget to take a few hours off once in awhile from all this trust stuff to remember some good stuff about your life.
Contribution of article made possible by Dr. Glenn Johnson PhD @ http://www.head-cleaners.com More articles, Hypnosis CD's tapes, and MP3's are available through Dr. J's website. |
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TAKE NOTE: In self-helping it's important to tell helpful from hurt. It's important to give yourself permission to consult a professional if you need one. Just as its important to get to a doctor if you're severely injured, and in borderline cases of injury it's better to waste the time it takes to go see a doctor than risk that you should have -- and just as one should not goof around with bandaids when an artery is gushing -- it's important to consult a psychologist,
psychiatrist or other counselor or physician -type professional if you believe you might, in fact, need one. Better safe and not sorry -- a stitch in time saves nine. If it turns out its a false alarm, the professional will tell you. You might take a look at the comments on