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 the initial idea & the work it entails to raise a pup to a dog that's supportive Again and again I find that people around me are adding puppies to their lives -- and then I am finding that their idea of having a dog was not working out the way they had envisioned. And in many of these cases, the individual finds that instead of this working out so that they have a dog to be supportive to to themselves or to their kids, instead they have to get rid of the dog and hurt their children's hearts and their happiness and their sense of security. (You risk giving your kid anxiety about their own welfare if you make it seem like any family member who becomes a problem will be ejected from the family. Kids do not feel they have a stable environment if it feels like they might be ejected themselves if they don't satisfy.) Having a puppy is like having a child -- at least for the first six or nine months. To have a puppy become a dog with any sense of belonging to the family, it takes almost the same amount of work that having a child does. It is a lot of work. Like having a baby, inattention to the little details and needs of a puppy makes for a problem adolscent and a problem adult. The basic differences between having an infant and having a puppy are 1) it is okay to put the puppy in it's kennel and leave it in there, unattended, for a few hours at a time, 2) you need not diaper the puppy or walk the infant, and 3) the puppy grows within three quarters of the first year to a level of self-sufficiency where you only need to assure food and water and walks outside. You cannot expect children to reliably care for a dog. You cannot expect children to take on the responsibility of the daily care of a dog. If you try to do this you will end up with a sick dog and/or a dog you must get rid of AND a child who will feel very inadequate and guilty OR you will simply end up realizing the error of you ways and taking care of the dog yourself. It is very hard on children to have them become attached to a dog and then have you get rid of it and it makes them feel even worse if they feel like it is their fault. the breed you might need & the ones that you don't There are very, VERY big differences between the different breeds of dog. Some shed hair, for example, and some do not. Some bark a great deal and some don't. Some tend to bond with one person and bite any others. Some tend to be good around children and some are very much not. Some need lots of running and some very little. You can find very helpful brief rundowns on the differences between breeds in books, magazines and on the internet. For example: Select the Right Puppy: Breeds and Characteristics rescuing puppies & dogs with past hurts If you have special psychological or animal training skills, rescuing puppies and older is a nice thing to do. However, if you do not have special skills, deciding to start with a challenging dog can be a heartbreaking -- not to mention house breaking -- mess. It is very difficult to turn down a heart-wrenching story but adding to it is an unfortunate idea. With puppies you do have a better chance of getting past unfortunate experiences and trauma. The older the dog, though, the more likely that there are going to be reasons for the dog needing a rescue. Some dogs are separated from their homes in floods. Some need to be given away because of a death or a serious change in a family's situation. Frankly, I am very suspicious about any dog that is being given away for any reason. It seems most people who pass away would likely have taken care of their dog by making sure he or she is placed with a close family. Most families that would find a move cause to give up their dog were possibly not the most committed of families in the first place. (I have moved dozens of times in my life and I have never, ever considered giving up my dog.) some important tips about picking a puppy Do not go look at puppies if you don't know if you can handle the breed. Puppies are little heart magnets. If you are interested in adding a puppy to your life, decide what breed you want and whether you want certain characteristics (e.g., long hair versus short, male versus female) BEFORE you go see a puppy. If you are not interested in the breed, sex, whatever, DO NOT GO SEE THE PUPPIES. Assume you will come back with a puppy if you go look at puppies. Take a look a mom and dad. Like mother, like daughter. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Etc. It is often the case that the parent's characteristics will show up in the pup. Just a tip. If you can see mom and dad and, better yet, play with them a bit, do so. You get a lot of information.You get a "feel" for how the puppy will be when an adult. It is just a feel but it is helpful. Contribution of article made possible through Dr. Glenn Johnson PhD @ http://www.head-cleaners.com More articles, Hypnosis CD's, Tapes and MP3's are available through Dr. J's website. |
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